Posts by Arthur Others

30

Is it morally wrong to put Watchtower behind?

by Darkknight757 in

with our latest and final run in with the elders, the wife and i had a very long talk about what's next in our life.

do we try to help others see the light as it were concerning watchtower or do we just let it go and move on with our life?

we have made it perfectly clear that we will never go back to watchtower and we are finally happy.

Arthur Others

Do we try to help others see the light as it were concerning Watchtower OR do we just let it go and move on with our life?

I think this is a decision for each person, but I do have an experience of wanting help from someone I knew, and they weren't in the position to help me. There was this woman that I was good friends with, and after a few years she was DF'd. Seeing how our JW friends treated her and how others treated her was one of the things that woke me up. So a few months after her being DF'd she reached out to me over text message and it was a small quick conversation. More time passed and I really needed to talk to someone about leaving the JW organization, so I reached out to her to meet up in person, since I didn't want to put anything in text message. She still has family that are JW's and I wasn't sure if she would tell them I was having doubts. She said she'll get back to me, but I never heard from her after that. As far as I know she's still DF'd. I don't blame her for not helping at all. I can understand where she was coming from, but doing it on your own can be tough, which is why I'm thankful for the stories and advice that people share on this site.

17

The Story of My Sister - Lurkers: Is this logical?

by Funchback in

my sister got baptized at 17 or 18 years old in 1983. she was ripe for the jw picking as she was shy, quiet, naive and with low self-esteem even though she was tall and beautiful and she attended one of the best high schools in philadelphia.. she wasn't outgoing and she only went out on a couple of dates prior to her baptism.

she worked at a day care center.

she loved children and animals.

Arthur Others

Now, here's the twist: Very soon after her wedding vowels, we were attending a Thursday night meeting (Theocratic Ministry School back then). Right before the closing prayer, they made an announcement: Leslie XXXXXXX has been disassociated....
No warning. No heads up. Just a cold announcement of disassociation.
I asked an elder, 'Why? Did she disassociate herself?'. He told me, "She was disassociated by her actions".

Man, what a sad story. Sorry to hear that happened to you and your sister. I'm a firm believer that it is not an organization of love. Getting to know a lot JW's from around the world and being around large and small groups of them time and time again, I have seen more pride and gossip than love. Over and over in my struggle to stay strong in the organization when I've felt weak, I have reached out to other brothers and sisters, or made it known that I could use the encouragement, and let me tell you the ones that did reach out were only interested in getting "my story" so they could gossip to other brothers and sisters about my spiritual progress. Out of the many there are very little that I would say have shown me true care, but even they use words about the governing body and end of days, that make me uncomfortable. The moment I think, "Man this person really does have love", they say something about a non-JW or even a fellow JW that makes me go back to, "darn it, that's not love"!

27

Angry and scared

by BlackWolf in

jw
friends

i feel like everything that comes out of my mothers mouth is something negative and cringe worthy.

all she seems to talk about with me is how terrible and demonic our disfellowshipped relatives are, how horrible the world and holidays are, or how she is so much better and "holier than thou".

it really makes me sick sometimes.

Arthur Others

I wasn't raised in, but what I can say is that I really wish I didn't get baptized. Not particularly because of any spiritual reason, but because of the social aspects of shunning. It's horrible for me to have to say "I wish I didn't get baptized because if I decide to research and talk openly about questions, I will get shunned". Just saying that out loud is mind blowing, when you consider how much love you're supposed to feel regarding a decision of dedication.

Stay strong, don't be pressured into it. Read and research as much as possible. I find strength in that.

19

When 2 JWs have the same call...

by schnell in

jw
friends

as i was driving past a certain gas station today, i recalled that the family who own it are called on by a friend of mine, and in a territory where it's hard to find interest.

it reminded me of an incident months back when this friend, brother d, discovered that another friend, brother b, was calling on that family too.

hey, gotta make your time.. those two went at it.

Arthur Others

I've heard stories of sisters in minivans while doing RV's, pull up on other groups of JW's in their territories and get into arguments about it. Also heard of arguments that come up on train witnessing regarding territory.

Not long after I got baptized, I had a study with a long time friend of mine. He was genuinely interested in the Bible and I didn't bring up that I was a JW, he came out and asked me questions, and if I would share literature with him, etc. So I said of course and would study with him. I remember being excited about it and telling this sister about it, and the first thing she said was not, "That's great!, hope he learns as much possible" or "That's really good you should bring him around". It was "make sure you tell him to go to the hall near his house, so the brothers there get to study with him". I was completely shocked that was her response. I thought, no way is this guy going to some place by his house to meet some random people to study the bible. The only reason he feels comfortable with me is because he's known me for over a decade and he's looking for info. Geez! Way to ruin an exciting thing for me early on, because of territory.

28

Did you ever experience true kindness in the Org?

by HereIgo in

i remember when i was about 17, i started shunning an older brother because he was disfellowshipped.

when i graduated high school, he pulled me aside and said " i know you are not supposed to talk to me, but i want you to have this" it was a gift that he had custom made for me.

i was so blown away, we never even had a real conversation before.

Arthur Others

This is a good topic. I want to say that I feel there are two brothers, who are both Elders, that I believe have genuine kindness and friendship for me. But I also fear that once I completely fade out, their kindness will be done. Meaning, conditional. Who knows? We'll see.

15

Worship of Men and Emphasis on Titles

by HereIgo in

i remember a few years back at a circuit assembly, a few bros were introducing themselves to the co, they made sure to mention that they were an ms or an elder from such and such cong.

i was also an ms, but was the only one that introduced themselves by just my first name.

i was so irritated and blown away at the arrogance by these bros, trying to impress men with titles!

Arthur Others

I was surrounded by this group of parents a few years back that used fear and guilt to keep their kids JW's. I knew their kids pretty well and I can tell they very much wanted to see what the world outside the organization was like. At assembly one time, the mother was very vocal about telling the kids to, "Make sure you go up and introduce yourself to the CO, make sure you're seen, and he remembers your name!". The kid's response when their mother left was, "I thought we're not supposed to worship men! Why is every running over there?". That brought a huge smile to my face, that they recognized it at such a young age.

21

JW's know how to guilt trip....

by HereIgo in

when i left the org, the jw's tried their best to guilt trip me.

some of the questions i was asked and things i was told:.

"how could you possibly be happy outside of jehovah's organization?

Arthur Others

Not to me personally, but I've heard others being talked about..

"Oh they'll be back, everyone realizes it's the truth sooner or later"

"They'll realize they can't really have Jehovah's love if they're not doing his will (going out in service)"

35

Some recent baptism figures in the UK - is there a "bounce back"?

by freddo in

jw
friends

well, round my way (south of the uk) all the way up to and including the regional conventions this summer, baptism numbers have been extremely low.

but i have just received news of three recent circuit assembly days where the figures seem to be higher.

(all have been across the last three weekends at a uk assembly hall in october).

Arthur Others

Last one day assembly I went to there were about 1000 in attendance and 10 baptized.

19

Petty Rules

by HereIgo in

did your congregation have any petty man made rules?

i remember the elders in my cong didn't like if a single brother and single sister walked in the parking lot together after the meeting ended, to their car.

you couldn't hold the mic or give a talk without a coat (that might be a universal jw rule).

Arthur Others

Wearing suit coat when on stage or doing mic work was heavy in my old congregation. I remember after I got baptized along with another brother in the congregation, we were given privileges to do mic work. So I did mic work for about two months and then all of a sudden my name fell off the list. So the other brother who just got baptized along side me decides to make it his responsibility to tell me, "Oh the elders got together and found out that they didn't all meet when discussing both of us and mic work and sound department. So we're both not on the list for the time being".

Then a week or so later, I see his name back on the list for sound department, and I'm still off the list. I never brought it up to anyone. I found it odd though they never "officially" took privileges away, they just stopped volunteering me. I found out months later, that the reason I got taken off mic work was because I didn't always wear my suit jacket to meetings. So I recalled all the times that I didn't wear my jacket and realized that only twice in the summer I left my jacket in my car before meeting and walked in without it, and that was before I was even baptized, and before mic work, so what do they care?! I ended up leaving that congregation.

98

Beards - September 2016 Watchtower

by Listener in

the issue of whether beards are acceptable or not is addressed in the september 2016 watchtower - well sort of.

it is as clear as mud as to whether they are allowed in places like australia, usa and britain.. 17. what are some factors that may affect whether a brother wears a beard?17 what about the propriety of brothers wearing a beard?

the mosaic law required men to wear a beard.

Arthur Others

I went to assembly to see a friend of mine get baptized. It wasn't my circuit so I didn't see any familiar faces other than the group of friends that all went for the baptism. I've been growing out my beard, and I could easily see more sisters staring my way, but not in a negative way, but a good way! Needless to say, I have a feeling brothers are going to start growing out their beards, even if it's a little scruff.